Gee, I love salad. I mean I really do. I can’t think of anything better than salad. I mean anytime, really: dinner, breakfast. Lunch! I wonder if God likes salad. No really, does God like salad? Think about it. Even assuming he doesn’t have to eat to survive, he could if he wanted to, right? If God wanted to he could sit down at a table and eat a salad with toasted almonds and walnuts and pepper nuts and heck nuts with bolts on them and all the sugar in the world. God could do that if he wanted. Maybe I’m God. Naw, I’m not God, that’s silly. I mean I’m pretty dang good, but God is pushing it. I mean not pushing it, but it’s a little much. OK, a lot much. But if I was, I would eat a salad. I would eat the heck out of a salad in front of everyone and it would just blow their freaking minds.